Feeling unwelcome in a relationship is such an indescribable feeling. You are together with this person because you fell in love with them. You wakeup wishing to share the small moments. You check your phone to see his/her name pop up. They cause this serge of happiness just by looking at you and smiling.
Then suddenly, you’re condemned for such acts. Desiring to talk is no longer encouraged, in fact it seems as though less communication would make them happier altogether. Looking at your phone seems useless, considering it hasn’t rang in hours. Moments you’d once share without a thought, become locked inside of you.
Essentially, you’ve transitioned into a burden. They no longer crave what they once did; what you still do. Your greatest downfall has always been your heart. “Too big for your own good,” as they say. You feel confused and idiotic for thinking this person could love all of you. Did you actually think someone could love you? You’re sitting here going over the files in your head of everything they’ve ever said and done. Pathetic.
They’re out living their life relieved that they haven’t heard from you. Every time you pick up your phone, that pang of emptiness reminds you that you’re no longer welcome on the other end. And the worst part?
The worst part is that the voice that is telling me all of this, is my own.